St Mungo's Passionist Catholic Church, in Glasgow, Scotland, has a beautifull stained glass window in the top right corner, where the Tabernacle and alter to The Sacred Heart is situated.
I really felt God draw me to this window, when I had visited there once for Eucharistic Adoration. I felt a great peace when I looked at it. That sort of stillness when you know God is trying to get your attention. I'm afraid the photo doesn't do it justice.
In the central panel of the window you can see a depiction of Jesus and The Sacred Heart. On one side stands St Margaret Mary Alacoque and on the other St John The Baptist. I feel this window really sums up my Charism as a Catholic Lay Benedictine Solitary.
God has called me to an intimate Contemplative Devotion to His Sacred Heart in Holy Mass and Adoration, particularly night vigils. But also, as an overflow of this Eucharistic Grace, God has called me to cry out, like John The Baptist in the wilderness, at all and any injustice, hypocrisy, abuse and cover up of abuse, especially on behalf of those who can not speak for themselves.
By God's Grace I've been doing this all my life. God specifically chose me for this Charism not because of anything I have done but because of my many personal short comings, as in my weakness, God's power is manifested.
It's an entirely Eucharistic vocation. Like my Confirmation Saint Felicity, it means giving my Fiat to being mauled, devoured and executed, over and over... but in that Grace of Martyrdom God can bring about great miracles of conversion and salvation.
That's what its all about at the end of the day - serving God as He made you to serve Him and for His purpose, which isn't always immediately obvious - it's a vocation of Loving Trust.
I've been discerning this vocation for about 18 months and in God's infinite kindness and love He gave me a very powerfull re-affirmation of His call for my vocation and charism, on this years Solemnity of The Nativity of St John the Baptist.
I experienced a quite overwhelming rush of the Holy Spirit during the Mass readings of that Solemnity Mass - quite emotional. That's only happened to me twice before - at the very start of my vocational call, after I moved to Our Lady of Muswell parish and the very first time I prayed the Rosary. I feel like I have come full circle now. I feel like I have found my vocation home. It's taken about 15 years and it was worth the wait.
It's great to be in love with Jesus. No matter what Cross it involves carrying with Him - it's still all so romantic. Hard to articulate but wonderfull to experience.
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